The Pew Point of View

#ThePewPointOfView After nearly 25 years of teaching and preaching the Word, I’ve “heard” 😛 that people are ok with audience participation but say, “If I have to” excessively:

“Find three people” (11 times in one sermon) and tell them __________,

Turn to my neighbor (21 times in one sermon) and tell them _________, 

Be “made” to get up on my feet and get out of my seat (2 times in 11 minutes after a 12-hour shift), 🏃🏾

Be shamed into shouting (cause I’m not showing emotion – You know, holding back the tears from the devastation in my life), 

Move from my “won’t praise ’em” neighbor’s row (cause they’re too tired from work or worry to shout) – so now my row ain’t blessed🤦🏽‍♀️, 

Wonder if there’s a point or purpose after listening 30-45 minutes 🤷🏾‍♂️

Grab somebody, or high five 52 people, or be touched (17 times in 12 minutes, while you stay sanitized 😷 and refuse to meet and greet), then…

Then… you probably just preached your first and last sermon to a lot of people. 

Iiiiiiiii TOO engage the audience (cause we all need a lil stirring 🙋🏽) and sometimes have to remember not to overdo it. But it should be voluntary, not condemning, and not a workout session. Mindful preaching values people and the fact they chose to take time to listen. 

Too many “fillers”, is an indication that we may be trying to get people to “feel” something instead of being “filled”. Nervousness can be natural, breathe and remember that HE is ready! 

Sermons should be scripture fed and Spirit led. When God breathes on a sermon from the #study of scripture, we don’t have to prop and script the people. The Word will work the atmosphere. 

#SensationalSermonsAreInsufficient #LetsWorkTheWord #Theopneustos, 2Ti3:16

Keep Your Standards UP

(This is love, no judgement, just mentorship.) Ladies, keep your standards UP – for dates, for phone calls, for walks in the park and adventures, doors being opened, gas being pumped, and sweet nothings. It’s a beautiful thing 💕 and shows that you are respected and valued. Until then, be found ready but willing to wait.

Do not be a chaser, Do not answer to cat calls, Do not respond to booty calls (rather texts, they don’t even call), do not ONLY text, do not ONLY messenger – don’t you get tired of that . He’s not giving you attention, he’s dangling you a carrot, maybe even just throwing you a bone. If a man can get by that lazily and cheaply, then he’s not that into you and obviously has other options at hand or isn’t ready, because he’s not investing in you. (Please tell me if I’m wrong, gentlemen.)

And, YES, there are great men out there who are desiring women who walk worthy of their value and are clear about their expectations. Good, God-fearing men are also wanting marriage, family, and fun times. And they are around!

The women I watched did it right. We call it old school but it still is the right school. Let him come to you like Luther sang it, “Excuse me, Miss, what’s your name, can I call you, can I take you out tonight” . Otherwise, stay off my row because #RomanceWins.

Whatever you set as your standard, that’s what you’ll get. And there’s a LOT of good to be gotten by being a great and gracious lady. You are worth it and so is he who recognizes that your value is above rubies.

#ChurchLady #Standards #ThankYouMamas #EchoZoeHaveLifeJohn1010 

5 Tips for Dating a Pastor / Preacher

I’ve been asked my thoughts on this subject (I wonder if some people are trying to tell me something. I hear the church mothers praying.). Here is a short list.

1) PREACHERS ARE PEOPLE TOO. Yes, there is a commitment to the Cross and the commitment to the call is unwavering. But the super- is not the only part of the -human. Yes, give respect to what you plan to do, but relax and have fun! And, don’t take me to church and call it a date. Also, if you are a serial dater and not serious, get off my row. You cannot get to know someone when everyone else is in your face and in your ear and, God forbid, in your bed. Being ‘deep’ is not impressive, we do church all of the time. Lastly, it may not be ideal to invite them to a drink fest or a club, either. There are so many things to enjoy. Just ask.

2) THE PEW IS NOT A POTENTIAL. Members within the church dating the pastor, No. Some may disagree but that doesn’t even seem natural to me. Preachers in the same church dating, that’s another post, because there is so much potential for drama and church fallout. For me, spiritually, members are sons and daughters. IJS.

3) DON’T WASTE THEIR TIME. If you are not #committed to Christ, don’t even…okay. If you are not ready for #commitment, move along. If you are not going to be #consistent, please move along. Those committed to ministry don’t need the stress of uncertainty nor an emotional distraction added to everything and everyone else they already have to handle. Please be #considerate and understand that mature and sincere preachers don’t want to add any drama to their life. A (potential) mate should do just the opposite.

4) PREACHERS / PASTORS DON’T ‘HAVE’ TO DATE OR MARRY ANOTHER PREACHER. If you do that’s great, too! But understand, ministry is a call for some, not all. Others who may be called to serve their Christian life out in the world of business or entertainment or sports or government or etc. are not expected to marry someone in their same field of work – same applies to preachers. A doctor doesn’t have to marry another doctor, or an attorney another attorney. The mark is, are you saved and do you respect what each of you do and support that PERSON in their life’s mission. (I’m not trying to get into the equally yoked, etc. conversation – that’s a given and we get it.)

5) KNOW WHO YOU ARE. It may take a little work to see how a pastor feels about you because they are guarded due to the nature of the work. Trust me, there’s a looooooottttt of crazy going around. As trust is built (by being honest and consistent), you’ll get to know where the heart is. Trust is earned and if you are in it for the right reasons, you’ll put forth a little investment to get a greater reward. So, it’s not you, it’s the caution of the call that makes the preacher respond slower. There’s a lot to consider – you, them, and those being served. Just know they are talking to you because of who you are and that should speak volumes.

Okay, that sums it up. Thanks and I truly enjoy answering. http://www.facebook.com/TashaDillon1, http://www.facebook.com/TashaDillonForMS, http://www.facebook.com/LetsTalkLive1

Oh, So Ready! But Don’t Rush It. 

It’s important to know how to walk in the “Ready” without being in a “rush”. The rush can make you move too quickly, on impulse. 

Impulse purchases are made “in the moment”, around hype, covered by the catchy packaging designed to catch your attention, with words used excite you. 

BUT, AFTER you’ve made the commitment and take it home, you get a closer look and begin to feel regret, maybe even anxiety, and you see details that you didn’t give attention to or overlooked in the hype. We learn to slow it down and think it through. And, it’s okay to say I’ll think about and get back to you. If you’re given a deadline but you don’t have peace, leave it. Walk away. A deadline with one does not mean a dead end on your desire. You are perhaps being rerouted. And, a mark of maturity is being able to make decisions that are thought out, even if the opportunity presented was not planned. 

In other words: Find me prepared and ever so READY but you will n.o.t. find me DESPERATE. 

In the process of waiting, cut off anything or anyone who wants to hold you up with stalling you, slowing you down, being vague or playing games with you while you’re in pursuit of happiness. 

With people, when you’re after purpose, a person is either in or out with you. “In” is being present and dependable, not perfect. “Out” leaves you with doubts, wandering if and when. “All In” is a win. “Inconsistent” will leave you discontent. 

You have come this far, so be willing to wait until it’s right – whether it’s for a large purchase, a big move, a spouse, a new pursuit, another investment or long-term commitment. 

I believe you want the best? Step back, wait, and rest in knowing that His will being done is the true prize. Habakkuk 2 teaches us that at the moment “it” comes, you don’t have long before it’s a sealed deal! And, Proverbs 10:22 says that it’s the blessing of the Lord that leaves you with NO sorrows, NO regrets. 

#YOUdeserveToBeCompleteSuccessfulHappy

#WaitYourTurnAndSeeHowWellHeDoesIt

Everyone Feels a Little Pain and Shame Sometimes

If anyone says they have only been on the “winning” side of relationships, they’re telling lies …probably narcissistic. Every normal person has won and lost in love …and that’s fair because that’s living and learning.  

If I did not see the worst of me through the failure, I couldn’t give the best of me to the one who will win my heart. Embrace all of what you experience, that’s where you learn to live life at its best. 

Don’t be afraid if you leaned in to love and you fell. Thank God for growth. I’ve hurt and been hurt, that’s life, good people. But when you heal, you live. I cannot apologize to those I left hanging, for I did not know love until I knew Jesus. And, even then, boy did/does He need to work on ME 🙌🏾. I can’t make up excuses for those I couldn’t love back or settle for; you have to live in truth. Present compromise is future frustration. 

For the uncompromising – money, means, mansions, ministry, and muscle are appreciated but not the primary criteria of the man that’s meant for you. It is to be applauded, but his TRUE quality is his character. You cannot put a crown on a clown and call him a king. You shouldn’t be a dress on a mess just to make her a Mrs. 

Women, be the example. Be available for the man to come after you. If he doesn’t want to pursue you, he’s just not that into you …shut that door, don’t play games with grown men. Men, if she opens the door and you know she’s the one, go get your blessing and appreciate that she wanted to be found and not expose herself like a clown. 
Easy and agreeable are a dime a dozen. You want a grown woman who understands value. That way, she adds to your heritage, not just your social media status. Cute doesn’t cut it. Pretty won’t be powerful when you need prayer. A woman is sexiest when she knows who she is and she submits that to you!

So, relax, God has the master plan. Don’t accept the side show. Wait for him. Wait for her. And when she is found, don’t you miss out being a clown. And, ladies when he finds you, you don’t have to compromise what you do. The pain and shame of the low moments built you for just the right moment. Be who God designed you to be. 

Don’t Ask God Why 🤔

Really?? The idea that “I know I shouldn’t ask God questions” is a bad idea. We are not questioning God’s “God-ness” because we ask our Father questions. EVEN JESUS asked, “…Why…”, Matthew 27:46. The question “Why?” or any other question is not too hard for God. As the psalmist declares “Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether” (Psalm 139:4). God tells Jeremiah “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations” (Jer 1:5), so God surely knows what we’ll say before we even say it. 

He designed us and can handle the hardest hitting questions and deepest thoughts we have. ➡️Real questions to God, by real humans living real lives, are in the Bible: Habakkuk 1:2; Habakkuk 1:3; Jeremiah 1:5-8; Psalm 10:1-4; Job 10:1; Ecclesiastes; Jonah 4:1; Revelations 6:10. 

A disciple is a hearer, learner and doer. How can we truly learn and have no questions? It’s like going to school but you never ask the teacher anything. The Disciples were full of ‘asking’ and Jesus was full of answering. 

Our scrutiny is puny in comparison to His wisdom. So, let Him drop some knowledge on you. A question is not unbelief, it’s an inquiring mind that wants to know. 

#AboutRelationshipNotReligion

Too Much

What’s the fighting all about? I’ve seen it too much and I’m sharing this in love, for growth. (And you all know I respect MEN and love my brothers who are about that Man’s Life). This is for those ‘other-lings’. 

If a man wants to make you the kind of woman who fights over him, that should make you want to fight your way away from him, in a hurry. Messy men come in all ages and are internally little boys. That’s not queen status, that’s crazy. And if you have to earn love like that, you’re in trouble. 

If you have to prove you’ll do whatever it takes ‘for your man’, contact another woman, or ‘get stupid’ to show you’re down for him; believe me, you are at the bottom of your potential. Low to no self-esteem is not healthy. Discover your own self worth even if your story is a little scandalous (Ruth, Naomi, Mary, Queen of Sheba, Well Woman, Rachel, Esther, Rahab, Abigail, Zipporah…). 

Apart from what any other person thinks about you, YOU know your own worth – diamonds value increases from the pressure. You can live your greatest life on the other side of that kind of thinking. Lift yourself to who you are, a woman of virtue, dreams, and passion to live abundantly. 

The only “B” you should answer to is “Boss” lady. (Why call yourself that other word? Are you a female dog on all fours? Really, I need someone to explain, please.) Those were fighting words in my day. Wow! 

Just who you are is enough. You are too much for some people. Be okay with it AND be it! 

#DiamondsSurviveTheDirtAndShine

#DiamondsThriveThroughThePressure

Reality is Real

SOCIAL. A few week ago, I viewed a video of THREE 15-year-old boys mercilessly beating a 13-year-old boy ON A SCHOOL BUS because he reported them for trying to sell drugs to him, the 13yr old.  It was brutal and heartbreaking. I’m not sharing the video because it is too disturbing for me – the cold-heartedness. May this child and his family receive justice and healing. God help.
It’s hard to briefly state my thoughts. Reality is NOT in these tv shows which are helping to move our children deeper into a culture of disrespect it’s in EVERY neighborhood. Parents, community, church goers church and community leaders, and civic, city, and governmental leaders – WE BETTER BE ABOUT DOING OUR PART…FOR REAL. When given the opportunity to impact a life or lives, LET’S DO OUR VERY BEST. Don’t waste people’s time with an agenda other than fulfilling the purpose the hand.
Psalm 1

A.C.T.S. Fellowship isn’t Just a Show, it’s for Real!

SPIRITUAL. I am a part of a wonderful fellowship of pastors, ministry leaders, and churches; and as we grow, I am more grateful that my resource base for great preachers and teachers continues to expands. However, most important is that it is a genuine fellowship, a fellowship of great men and women who love God; it is a great family.

Feel free to share about a Christian fellowship that is important to you.

 

Rise and Shine 

SPIRITUAL. Isa. 60:1 (below)

We have to “get up” in our spirits to righteousness. We have to “wake up” in our minds to truth. 

The external cannot be our only pursuits because even if you put a CROWN 👑 on a CLOWN 🤡, it still does not make him or her a king or a queen. Royalty resides on the inside and it’s not the same as haughty pride. The world promotes the latter through lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life. But, on the kingdom of God, to go up we must first go down. God wants to ensure our well is not springing up bitter and sweet, or rather, contradictory living. James 3:11, 1 John 2:16, Obadiah 1:3a, 2 Chronicles 32:26

The internal you is the true you. So, shine from within (eternal) not ONLY without (temporal). 1 Cor. 15:31, John 3:16, Psalm 51

#BeGreatBecauseYouAreMeantToBe

“ARISE from the depression and prostration in which circumstances have kept you–rise to a new life]! Shine (be radiant with the glory of the Lord), for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen upon you! [Zech. 8:23.]” Isaiah‬ ‭60:1‬ ‭AMPC‬‬

“Get out of bed, Jerusalem! Wake up. Put your face in the sunlight. GOD ’s bright glory has risen for you. The whole earth is wrapped in darkness, all people sunk in deep darkness, But GOD rises on you, his sunrise glory breaks over you. Nations will come to your light, kings to your sunburst brightness. Look up! Look around! Watch as they gather, watch as they approach you: Your sons coming from great distances, your daughters carried by their nannies. When you see them coming you’ll smile—big smiles! Your heart will swell and, yes, burst! All those people returning by sea for the reunion, a rich harvest of exiles gathered in from the nations! And then streams of camel caravans as far as the eye can see, young camels of nomads in Midian and Ephah, Pouring in from the south from Sheba, loaded with gold and frankincense, preaching the praises of GOD. And yes, a great roundup of flocks from the nomads in Kedar and Nebaioth, Welcome gifts for worship at my altar as I bathe my glorious Temple in splendor.” Isaiah‬ ‭60:1-7‬ ‭MSG‬‬

“Arise, shine; for thy light is come, and the glory of the Lord is risen upon thee.”‭‭ Isaiah‬ ‭60:1‬ KJV